Pub Quiz
1 Random Chaos 53
2 University of Inwood Silver Medal Thumb Wrestling Team (Pan Am Games) 52
3 Is it a Pimple or a Boil? 49.5
Bervis Kaufman Fan Club 48.5
Seaman and Cumming and Sheep 43.5
Trivialis Trivialis 43
Woman and Husband 36.5
Ignorant Virtuosos 33
Ron Mexico's Vibrating Head 33
Darmok and Jalad at Pub Trivia 27
Thundercats 26.5
Evil Mr. Phil

Deep Thoughts by Dr. Jordan: Isn't it crazy that without the most beautiful woman in Europe, we all would have forgotten about Harald I of Denmark?

Evil Mr. Phil

This week's pub quiz was over: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that. The register of the scores was signed by the quizmaster, the bartender, the other quizmaster, and the guest quizmaster. Dr. Jordan signed it: and Dr. Jordan's name was good upon 'Change, for anything he chose to put his hand to. This week's pub quiz was as over as a door-nail.

All the sheets were handed in, the scores were handed out, the prizes were handed over, and all the beer was all handily consumed by all. The night had become another stitch in the long, luxuriant fabric of the IRCPQ's history. Another square of two-ply on our novelty roll of toilet paper, if you will. The quizmasters and the quizmastees had all gone home. The night was over. Everything was done.

Everything, except the weekly recap.

The most important thing to know is that Dr. Jordan had yet another virginal quizmaster taking a shot at doing our job last night. This week's bold volunteer was a man from IMSA who shall henceforth be known only as Greggles.* As Robin tells me, a new quizmaster's first round selections offer us a unique window into their soul. If that is true, then Greggles has a soul filled with U-boats, Omega Men, Illinois, Cheap Trick, Ronald Reagan, comets, and lots and lots of backing bands. Not bad.

It's also been said that grizzled, old veterans of quizmastering's rounds offer a glimps into what they ate for dinner last night. A window into their gut. We learned last night that Dr. Jordan's gut is filled with Number Two, MI6, 10 Little Indians, potent potables of all kinds, and one Ben Franklin quote short of a whole round on presidential quotes.

Throughout the night there was some excellent chugging. I particularly enjoyed watching PJ, who finds chugging too easy, casually begin his beer a second or two late and still manage to pull off a tie. Woman and Husband each showed off some chugging skill, and is it just me, or was that the first time they've ever been seen in the same place at the same time?

In the end it was Random Chaos, continuing their consistent streak of organized thought, getting another win for the night. Perhaps the randomness will end next week as we bend time to end the month of August early, all so we can make room for the Nerd Night Mixer. By the way, have you seen this amazing artwork made by our very own Jon Wunder?

Return of the Jordan

See you next week.

* - Only slightly less important than that is breakfast.

Evil Mr. Phil
1 Random Chaos 54
2 Is it a Pimple or a Boil? 47
University of Inwood Silver Medal Thumb Wrestling Team (Pan Am Games) 47
3 Trivialis Trivialis 44
Seaman and Cumming and Sheep 43
Paul Ryan Gives Good Fountainhead 42.5
Darmok and Jalad at Pub Trivia 42
Competitive Horse Prancers 41.5
Sam Outsmarts the Acorn Decayer 40
Queer and Present Danger 38
Woman and Husband 38
Touched By an Uncle 21
Evil Mr. Phil

Dr. Jordan has just sent me the hint, "A man, a plan, a canal - Panama!"

I don't know about you, but I'm guessing there will be a round on Panamanian fauna, or Panimals.

Evil Mr. Phil

This isn't a hint. It's just two quizmasters out on the town. And, there's nothing wrong with that.

Quizmasters on the Town

Evil Mr. Phil

Ah, summer camp. The place where lasting memories (and fears) are formed. When I was a young man*, I spent one week every summer at Camp Bonner in North Carolina. Every year my tent was in the Iroquois campsite which was pretty conveniently located in the middle of the whole camp, though it had one oddity. At the head of the trail leading to the Iroquois campsite was an old tree with a peculiar arrangement of knots and limbs about 12 feet from the ground that made the tree look like it had a perpetual erection. As any typical, camp-going teenager would, we cleverly called it the Bonner Boner Tree.** Not only did the tree have a boner, but at least once during the week the tree got some unlucky camper's underwear as a tasteful decoration. How's that for having your shorts raised up on a flagpole?

Where was I going with all this? Oh, yeah. I'd like to thank our guest quizmaster, Field Sergeant Jen, for hosting on Wednesday and delivering such a nostalgia-inducing round about summer camps. Dr. Jordan also had a round that brought me back to a time in my youth when I was left to me own primitive devices in a cruel and unforgiving wilderness - ah, mathematical word problems. We quiz-goers also got to demonstrate our knowledge of dogs, Johnnies, the Breakfast Club, and opening sentences from classic literary works. That's what I call a hell of a night.

Not only that, but we had new t-shirts to win this week. What could be better? Perhaps some shirts that didn't look like they'd been balled up in a suitcase for the last month could have been better. I do apologize again that they were a bit wrinkled, but when I smuggled them away from my former employer I was more concerned about getting a variety of sizes for you to pick from than keeping the shirts nice and smooth. I'm not sure Jen will ever forgive me, but I hope everyone else can.

Finally, the word is out that August 29th will be the Nerd Night Mixer at the IRCPQ. You're probably wondering what that means exactly. As soon as I figure it out, you'll be the first ones to know. Stay tuned.

* - The Evil Master Phil?
** - I spent most of this morning searching the Internet for pictures of the Bonner Boner.

Evil Mr. Phil
1 Is it a Pimple or a Boil? 42*
University of Inwood Silver Medal Thumb Wrestling Team (Pan Am Games) 42
2 The Black Squirrels of Isham Park 41
3 Gittlemarsh 39
Random Chaos 39
Trivialis Trivialis 38
Fried Chicken Pride Parade 37
We Play Like NBC, These Are Last Round's Answers 36.5
Seaman and Cumming and Sheep 36.5
Darmok and Jalad at Pub Trivia 34
Sam Outsmarts the Acorn Decayer 34
Competitive Horse Prancers 32.5
Uncommon Core Standards 31
Tenorama 30
Ignorant Virtuosos 26
Woman and Husband 21
Evil Mr. Phil

I just got a tip from tonight's guest quizmaster, and it's...

Jason Alexander and Holly Hunter, together for the first and last time.

Evil Mr. Phil

Why is Apolo Anton Ohno at the Summer Olympics? Did he think there was some kind of Celebrity Dancing with the Stars: All Stars event to participate in? Was he upset that Ranomi Kromowidjojo showed up with a name even cooler than his own? Perhaps he just couldn't keep himself away from such a fiercely competitive environment. If that was the case, he should have been at the Indian Road Café Pub Quiz on Wednesday, where records and egos are shattered every single week, and no exceptions were made this week.

Deacon McGuire, Philadelphia Quakers by New York Public Library

Dr. Jordan brought the competitive pot to a quick, competitive boil when he started the night with a round all about the Olympics. But, he didn't stop there. We also got to identify flags from around the world and list the happiest nations in the world. For those of us "Real Americans", that was about as much internationality as we could stand. Fortunately, Fozzie was in the house as a guest quizmaster and brought a bag full of good old fashioned American pop culture! Not only did we get to piece together backwards movie plots, but we also got a common bond dedicated entirely to Fargo.* Most importantly, both Dr. Jordan and Fozzie kept the free beer flowing through the night. And, that's really what matters.

If all that wasn't enough to fill the bar with Apolo Anton Ohnos, we also had the triumphant return of OJ the Imposter (aka The New Daddy In Town). His new baby, Optimus Prime, was a big fan of the quiz, but she asks that there be more questions about girls ...and babies ...and transformers.

Looks like Random Chaos won it for the night, which means they're now the frontrunners for the August monthly prize. Could they be the first team to win the Quizmasters' Cup for consecutive months? Who knows, but did I mention that we're giving away the August monthly prize on August 22nd?

* - So I'm told. I regrettably had to leave early to go make a fool of myself somewhere else.

Evil Mr. Phil